Saturday, April 8, 2017

Saturday Post 187c

Good evening again! Em’s new plodding total for Saturday now stands @ 1842. Righteo, continuing Saturday’s events?
-        When Kim announced her arrival two minutes early, I walked myself slowly and safely to the front door and let her in, always rising above the cruel and unfaithful God’s near-overwhelming hatred and not letting Him push me over.
-        So a nice hot shower for me today – I washed and rinsed my own hair. I also softly, slowly but most hatefully sang 16% of my shorter second-favourite song slowly, softly but most hatefully out aloud, opening both eyes for all the important numbers.
-        I had one tinkle before I flipped the nice hot water off, mostly dried myself (thanks to Kim who kindly helped me dry my back, Era and both legs), mostly creamed myself (again, thanks to Kim who kindly helped me cream my back, Era and both calves) then mostly rekitted myself (thanks to Kim who helped with Erf’s sock, Elf’s AFO and both laces). Then I used the loo for one tinkle, washed and dried Era then walked myself slowly and safely out to the gobbling :P table, rising above the cruel and unfaithful God’s near-overwhelming hatred and not letting Him push me over.
-        Well, pity Kim only lemme drink green tea and not white tea with two sugars, but on the bright side, I got to happily read for another hour and still had time to watch Ten’s sports report! As for Kim, she cleaned the bathroom then sat and gently massaged Ela for like fifty-five minutes while watching chemistry YouTube videos.
-        At 5:55pm, I took myself once more slowly and safely to the loo for two tinkles and back, again rising above the cruel and unfaithful God’s near-overwhelming hatred and not letting Him push me over. Kim’s back Monday~
-        When dearest dad returned home, he was immediately all for gleefully FORCING L me to use the bloody cross trainer for him. Instead, he booted me off to bed and demanded I give Elf’s ankle a rub. Huh, he even had the audacity to claim that he’d taught me how to rub Elf’s ankle HUNDREDS of times! Fair enough, the cruel and unfaithful God has left me with awful memory loss, but I’m almost certain that he’s NEVER taught me how to rub Elf’s ankle before!
-        When PIG mum tumbled downstairs from pigland, she rekitted both feet and I had to let her gleefully FORCE L me to walk out to the kitchen bench, where I had to let her and dad gleefully force me to endure 25+ minutes of painful stretching for poor Elf.
-        To top it all off, I had to let the parents gleefully FORCE L me to plod 500 steps on the bloody cross trainer for them. Well, I actually did 505 and will most certainly sing myself to sleep tonight; SCREW counting! >< *sigh*
-        After an entire clothes set change (sometimes I suspect PIG mum helps just so she can boss me around about my posture *sigh*), dinner was the yummy rice, lotsa yummy wombok, lotsa sweet carot, lotsa dearest dad’s home-grown wintermelon and a few tiny delicious chunks of chicken.
-        Dinner was spooned down with one rather disgusting bowl of soup before I walked myself slowly and safely back online, again rising above the cruel and unfaithful God’s near-overwhelming hatred and not letting Him push me over.
-        Anyways, nature’s calling now, so fingers crossed I can brb after one final loo trip with my final, final plodding total for Saturday, the final, final events for tonight plus what’s happening Sunday, else hope to see everyone @ church toms!
Cheers,

Em. ^^

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